I sleep late into the morning. It’s been so long since I slept deeply that I feel trapped, like I want to wake but I can’t, like I’m beneath a sheet of ice on a frozen lake. I claw my way to the surface while the warmth and comfort do their best to drag me back down. As I come to I realize it’s not warmth of comfort from my bed alone.
Riley is wrapped so tightly in my arms it’s a wonder I haven’t suffocated her. Clearly I’ve been clinging to her like a life raft in the night and I’m a little embarrassed to be so needy – and so hard. Her long, lithe body is naked, twisted into mine and my body reacts with the disbelief that I still feel in my heart.
“Morning,” she says without opening her eyes. I almost let go of her, so embarrassed to be caught out with my hard-on spearing the soft flesh of her hip. She rolls experimentally, just a few inches, and stops. Then she giggles.
But she’s sliding underneath me. Her eyes open and they’re beautiful – clear and bright. She pushes my hair back from my face in two handfuls and draws me down to kiss her lips. As she does, she parts her thighs and takes me between them. I’m trembling I’m so ready to be inside her and she doesn’t make me wait.
I realize how nervous I was last night to be with her for the first time. After everything, especially Anna standing in the doorway screaming that I’d never pleased her, it was just another chance for Riley to finally realize that I was not good enough for her. Instead it was incredible. I felt swept away and Riley was right there with me. We had made love, not just had sex, and it had changed things between us yet again.
Riley guides her body down until my tip is just teasing her slit then takes me in. I have to close my eyes against the sweet softness that presses me tight.
“Morning,” I whisper with awe in my voice. It’s another sign that she wants me as much as I want her.
“I was dreaming about you.” She breathes softly, her body stretching to make room for me. I go slowly, more because it feels so intense than wanting to draw it out. I know the minute we are done I’ll be ready to go again.
Once I’m in deep and moving, I lose track of everything but the noises she makes. My mouth is everywhere on her body that I can reach – rolling her nipple between my lips, nipping the tender skin of her neck. She slides her tongue between my lips and matches the pace of my cock inside her. Before long we’re both gasping.
I’m not scared to lose myself. I lost myself to Anna and she used it against me. Riley feels ready to lose herself to me in return. I want to make her see stars, I want to make her scream my name and keep her up for days just flooding her body with pleasure. I want to hold her in my sleep, I want to bring her home to Montreal. I want to sit with her on the couch and pretend to watch TV while I just listen to her breathe.
Kris’s gaze is so intense that I have trouble holding it on the brink of orgasm. He’s so strong, so thick and heavy that he mixes me like batter for a cake. I could have come ten times already but I’m fighting it because I want to go together.
Last night was tremendous – the best first time I’ve ever had with someone. Of course I’ve never known anyone like Kris. He could still be wandering broken through the minefield Anna left, but instead the beads of sweat on his brow say he’s enjoying himself, that he’s enjoying me. I moan without thinking as his hips roll my entire body deep into the soft sheets of his bed.
“Come with me,” I whisper. I can barely take my hands from his incredible hair to feel the flexed muscles of his shoulders and back. I’ll need a lot more nights if I’m to know his body to way I want to.
“Oui,” he says softly. He ramps up his pace, making it harder for me to hold on. I buck and shudder until I lose the fight; he cracks me open like an egg. My hands lock around his thick biceps and I arch my back off the bed. I swear I hear him laugh before it turns into a growl against my neck. He slams up hard four times, coming high and hard deep inside my eager body. When he’s still, his eyes stay open.
“Do you still have that key from last night?” he asks. He’s tossed across me so I can’t move, but just nod yes.
“Good,” he pants. “Keep it.”
Riley wraps her arms tightly around my back. There’s probably something to do or somewhere to be today, maybe even a game tonight. But I settle in as close as I can, close my eyes and drift back to sleep.
-- end --
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There it is, the un-question: do you want this? Will you stay?
I have harbored the fear that Riley is mostly interested in me because I am unreachable. That she knows some part of me is broken and when it’s fixed she will no longer want me. It’s unfair to her but I don’t trust my good fortune.
Then she said what she said to Anna. Not just ‘get out,’ or ‘you lose.’ She said ‘best thing you ever had’ and ‘taken your place.’ She said those things about me. And so I tell her the truth, the thing I had to tell myself in order to keep moving forward. Next time, I promised. Next time I’ll make her want to stay.
Well she’s here now, poured onto the couch like a mold that fits perfectly against me. She closes her eyes for a moment, taking in what I’ve said and everything that’s just happened. When she opens them I think she’ll smile. I worry she’ll shake her head no. Instead she slowly kisses me, her light eyes on my dark ones, and tells me without a word that she has every intention of staying.
I’m up in a second and I lift her right off the couch. She clearly didn’t think I could do that, but she’s in my arms and I carry her right down the hallway into my bedroom. New sheets, new mattress – if I have my way they’re about to get a very warm welcome. I lay Riley down and swing myself on top of her.
I would have told that bitch off last week if I’d know it would get that kind of reaction.
I giggle as I think it. In reality things have gone exactly as they should have with Kris – I believe he’s healed enough to get back in the game. And the fact that he just carried me into his bed means the game is definitely on.
My hands can’t stop from moving in his thick, dark hair. I hold it back from his face and kiss his soft lips as he settles the weight of his body all along mine. He slides his lips to my neck again then uses his fingers to slowly tug the neckline of my dress open and kiss out over my shoulder. He follows the fabric along my chest, pulls to reveal the cup of my bra then traces over the smooth, seamless material. His big thumb has my nipple hard in a second. He draws down the thin satin and puts his mouth to my skin. While he kisses and licks at me, the slightly rough tips of his fingers drag lightly over the sensitive round of my breast.
I moan quietly. Everything about Kris is hot – he’s hot to the touch, his mouth is hot on my bare skin. The room is getting really hot. I slip my hands under his shirt and up his back. There are muscles and angles I’ve never known to exist. He lifts his chest so I can pull his sweater off completely.
Mother of God. It’s not much a leap to imagine what Kris looks like shirtless but holy shit, it’s a good thing I didn’t see this before. My palms run over the bulging muscles of his arms and over his shoulders and chest. He uses the pause to peel my dress from my shoulders and arms then unsnap my bra. Now we’re even.
I make another wordless noise as Kris buries his face in my chest more urgently now. My hands are so full of his beautiful body that I am distracted and don’t think – I lift my hips into his and grind against him. His breath catches against my breast and he groans.
“Okay, ma cherie,” he laughs as he lifts away.
He stands bare-chested over me in the half-light spilling from the hallway. My dress is around my waist but not for long – I lift my hips to help as he pulls it slowly from my hips. Then I sit up and unbuckle his belt. There’s no way I’m missing my chance to do this. I run my fingers up and down the sides of his zipper and he half-laughs, half-curses. Finally I slowly draw the zipper down and push his pants toward the floor. The soft gray of his boxer-briefs is all shadows around the angles of his hardening length. Without thinking I lean in and run my mouth over the soft cotton, all along his shaft.
That gets a real curse from him.
I think I’m going to pass out. The blackness I pray for when my head aches threatens to wash over me now, but there’s no way I’m missing my chance to feel this. Riley’s breath is hot through the thin fabric of my shorts and the press of her lips to my throbbing cock. A lesser man would hold her down and run it right down her throat. I’m trying to resist the urge.
Riley has other ideas. She deftly pulls the waistband out and down, freeing me to stand at attention before her. Then she looks up at me, those light eyes shining in the dim light. And with a tiny smile she slides my tip between her soft lips.
I moan. I don’t even try to stop. The hot, wet squeeze of her mouth is nearly enough to finish me off immediately. As she works her way down, licking and sucking, I put my hands into her silky hair and whisper a plea for strength. Then my tip touches the back of her throat and the blackness is back, waiting.
“Mon dieu I can’t….” I pull her free and push her back onto the bed, climbing on top of her in one motion. She giggles. I should go slow but rather I push her knees apart and quickly kiss my way up the inside of her milky thigh. She wears black panties – a lace waistband with a solid piece running down between her legs. It’s silky beneath my tongue as I lap over the heat radiating from her.
“Kris,” she whispers. I’m going to make her say that a lot.
My fingers are clumsy as they reveal her sweet spot. Their slight callous pulls at the smooth sheen of her delicate lips. Another whisper as I take a moment to trace around her slit then I taste her. My tongue slides slightly between her folds and I may actually pass out.
She tastes of honey. She tastes the way she’s made me feel – better, lighter, intoxicated. My cock pulses hard knowing she’ll feel even better. But for now Riley is twisting her fingers in my hair, whimpering as I take my time enjoying this first taste.
“Kris,” she says again, louder. I oblige by twisting my tongue and running it right up her smooth slit into her clit.
“Oh God!” Her hips buck against my face and I lose the ability to stop – I just go at her. My finger slips deep into her pussy, followed by another, while I stay zeroed in on her button. It rolls against my tongue like a candy. I am going to make her come once, just for me, as selfish and needy as I am. I need her to feel like this for me at least once before we feel it together. She has given me that much.
Holy shit. I’d have done this the second I saw him if I knew how it would feel.
The soft burr of his beard against my feverish skin. The added tickle of his moustache as he works my pussy into a hot mess. The silky fall of his hair brushes my inner thigh with every move. Then his thick, wide fingers pump at me, searching. My abs tighten and I’m about to lose it over nothing but his tongue when he brushes the spot inside.
“Oh God,” I say right out loud. My hips jerk up, begging for more, and he slides free for a moment. Just tongue. Then his fingers, lightly this time but right on target. I buck and he teases again, just his tongue twisting and rolling against me. He does it ten, twenty, a hundred times until I’m practically dead.
“Kris, please,” I say. Such a gentleman, that’s all it takes. He presses two slightly rough fingertips to my g spot and holds, catching my clit between his lips and rolling and sucking hard. The orgasm runs me over like a train – I arch my back, twist my hands in the sheet, and come hard for him. That velvety tongue drags and sweeps as I shudder and buck, lapping me up and licking me clean. When I finally flop out, two thoughts cross my mind:
The first is: before I have to fake it my ass. Anna clearly didn’t know a thing.
The second: I want you right now.
Okay, so I said that second part out loud.
I’m completely overwhelmed by the sensation of making Riley come. I’m so hard I’m practically humping the bed as I work away at her perfect secret spot. Her moans tell me she’s enjoying it and that makes me want to work harder. When she bucks against my face I give in the game and just swing for the fence, hoping I’ve gotten it right. Because I really want to get this right. She bursts like a fruit, sweet and delicious, and I grind my lap into the mattress to keep from coming myself.
Nothing Anna said was true. I can do this. I can take care of Riley the way she’s taken care of me. I’m not broken and Riley believes me.
When I’m searching for any last drop, telling myself to be calm and make sure I’ve taken care of her, I hear Riley say:
“I want you right now.”
I go on blind instinct. I slide up her body, catching the way her eyes get slightly wide as they see the flex of my arms and shoulders. Then she’s under me, kissing me, and the pulsing tip of my dick finds its way right to her slit. I’m dizzy with anticipation. She’s right there with me.
“Kris, I want you,” she says. I slide inside her and press slowly against her tight little pussy. The pressure is exquisite and I push forever until I feel her ass against my thighs. We both sigh with pleasure.
“Wow,” she says quietly. I open my eyes and she’s biting her lip, eyelids half closed and fluttering. My lips find her neck, right at her pulse point, and confirm that she’s running at full speed too. The hot, wet squeeze of her body is making me sweat.
I stroke slowly, testing that I can survive the first few pulls and pushes. She’s more confident than I am – because she can’t tell how incredible she feels – and twists her hips against mine. I groan into her neck. She arches her head back with a gasp as I return the favor. That sound is more than I can take. I go. She goes. We pump and thrust and I’m stroking into her while trying to run power play drills in my mind to keep from coming. It’s not working. There is nothing on Earth that can block out the feel of Riley beneath me, around me. I’m way too close way too soon.
Riley’s hand press down my sides and she digs her nails into my ass. “Oh God, Kris,” she sobs. I feel a telltale flutter in her hips, lean forward and feel it in her stomach too. My pace slows – her body is clenching and it’s tougher to push and pull. But it feels even better and I work hard to maintain. Riley moans, low and soft.
“Come for me, Riley,” I whisper. It’s a very forward statement for me, something I would never have been comfortable saying to Anna. Too intimate, too obviously a warning that I’m not going to make it. Anna would have ridiculed me. But I feel like telling Riley she’s amazing, incredible, unbelievable. “You feel amazing,” I tell her.
She whispers my name. Just my name. “Kris.”
Then she comes. It’s like a little star going supernova – her sweetness bursts like it did in my mouth, only the sensation is heightened by how tightly I’m held, how deeply I’m buried. She moans and squeaks as I carefully do exactly what I was doing when she went. My name is said again, “Oh God, Kris.”
I’m right there with her. The extra warm wetness that fills her coats me, transferring even more electricity between our bodies. I bite down gently on her soft shoulder and let myself come.
Her skin fails to bury my cry. It’s half-grunt, half- shout as I burst inside her. Relief comes with release – actual, real relief of tension and fear and pain and the release of anything else I was holding onto. The release of Anna. My cock pulses, beating itself out inside her tight snatch and everything that I was holding onto pours away. Her lips find mine and I know she can feel it too.
It’s embarrassing but I can’t help it. I stay buried inside her, willing it to stop, but a tear leaks from the corner of my eye. Great, now I really am the loser, crying after sex. My face is pressed to her cheek but she knows it anyway.
“Shhh,” she barely says. Her thumb draws lightly across my cheek. And that’s it – she doesn’t make it a big deal. She simply brushes it away like it’s over and I believe her.
I have barely caught my breath before Kris comes, taking it from me again. The sound he makes is almost like an animal – it’s a cry for help and a threat at the same time, like he’s wounded but not giving up. The stimulation of having him buried inside me is so much that I could cry.
I’m not surprised that he does, just one tear that I see. The guy has been through a lot and I’d worry if he didn’t feel it. Normally something like telling another girl off would affect me for days, but I’ve been distracted by Kris. I hope I have provided the same for him. So I brush away the tear and kiss him again. Because all that stuff is over.
“Riley.” It’s soft and there’s shame in his voice.
“You are amazing,” I tell him honestly because I have just had the night of my life. And I want to do it again soon so I can’t risk losing him now.
“Please stay tonight,” he says.
I stretch my arm out and scrunch up the blanket in one hand, then fold it over our half of the bed. We don’t need it with our own heat but it’s comforting nonetheless. I’m not going anywhere. It takes less than five minutes and I don’t know which one of us falls asleep first.
I'm so sorry for being AWOL! I'm changing jobs and moving and this week just got away from me. I will make it up to you, I promise.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” she says.
She’s prettier than I expect, this girl who tore Kris to shreds. Blond hair and light eyes – next to him she must have looked like a ray of sunshine. Boots, leggings, layers, scarf, jewelry: she’s put together in that effortless way I could never hope to achieve.
But her face is hard. I register her the same time she registers me: intruders in each other’s undefined space. There’s a flash of something soft, like maybe she came here to beg forgiveness or win him back. When she sees someone else where his arms, she gets mean. “This whole time you’ve been seeing someone else. All that sad puppy dog bullshit and here you’ve got some other girl too. Jesus, Kris, I almost felt bad about you.”
I watch him decide what to do. The clenched fist wants to tell her to go fuck herself. The slumped shoulder wants to explain that he would never do cheat. The closed eyes just want this whole thing to be over.
Of course I’m already mad. Anna could meet the business end of my boot and land somewhere around the stop sign on the corner. But Kris needs to fight his own battles. I need to see if he can.
“Get out, Anna,” he says.
No explanation, no apology. Just GTFO. Good man, I think.
“I came for my stuff.”
“I dropped it at Maureen’s. All of it.” Kris’ hand is still on my arm. He squeezes down now.
Anna tilts her head, mocking. “Well I don’t live there anymore.”
“But that’s where you got the spare key, right? Because you sure as hell didn’t go to Sidney’s for the other one. Maureen couldn’t find it when I brought your stuff over; now we know why.”
Like a kid caught stealing, Anna recoils. “Fuck you, Kris. Acting like you’re better than me when you’re really just a better liar. I should have fucked your friends when they all tried to pick me up.” Then she turns to me. “Take my advice honey, and land a teammate. Unless you’re into holding hands and crying before you have to fake it.” She looks me up and down with pursed lips, judging. “They’re not picky, I’m sure one of them would fuck you.”
Kris’ hand is so tight on my arm he’s touching bone. He’s either fighting the urge to kill her or asking me not to. That perfect jaw line is locked and his teeth grind audibly. The idea of this hard, horrible girl with beautiful, gentle Kris churns bile in my stomach. There’s no instinct to defend myself – I don’t give two shits what she says about me. I wish Kris would stand up for himself but he looks so exhausted. My instinct is to protect him.
“Get out, Anna,” he repeats like it’s all he can manage. She huffs shortly, she’s not done arguing.
“Or maybe they already have.” Now she’s trying to goad me into a fight. “Is that what you were doing while he was with me, fucking your way down the food chain till you ended up here? Sid’s sloppy seconds keeping you warm at night now, Kris?”
She’s kicking him while he’s down. I can’t stop myself.
“What are you doing here if it was so bad? Did you run out of other guys to fuck? No one wants your sorry ass anymore, nowhere to go, and so you’re back to get for the best thing you ever had. Well too late, bitch. Someone smarter has taken your place.” I stand up – even in Kris’ socks I have a few inches on Anna. I get close enough to throw a punch but instead hold out my open hand.
“And now I’ll take that key.”
I am wobbly. My weight seems to double and the couch threatens to swallow me as Anna stands there spitting insults. She’s so hawkish, so brittle and festering that I wonder how I could have ever loved her. How I could ever have seen anything but ambition in her eyes.
The words she says are meaningless, so false as to be almost comical. I was loyal as a puppy to her and my teammates never liked her, would never do that to me. Max or Jordan might do it to each other, TK would take whatever he could get, Crosby could have anything he wanted. But they know I couldn’t survive such a hit. Even so they didn’t want Anna – if anything they wished I were rid of her long ago.
Riley bristles visibly, her posture straightening with each lie Anna tells like her vertebrae are clicking into place. I should throw Anna across the street, defend myself and show some self respect. But I’m so tired. Two minutes ago I felt invincible, stopping my smile only long enough to kiss Riley again. Now I feel deflated and resigned but that doesn’t mean I am defeated.
“Get out, Anna.”
Despite everything, Anna knows when my mind is made up. I hope this will be enough but she turns on Riley. If she can’t make me take her back, maybe she can make Riley leave. I’m no good at being alone – if she can separate us, I’ll be an easier victim to hunt.
I almost laugh. Anna wouldn’t stand a chance against Riley. A part of me wants to tell her I’ve only known Riley a few days. To say that Riley has gotten in deeper, has given me more, has been a better person in a week than Anna ever was. I want Anna to know she’s been bested by the new girl. But Riley does that herself.
“Someone smarter has taken your place.”
Anna looks back to me once more, unable to believe she’s actually losing a fight in this house. She was the undisputed heavyweight champion for a long time. But she sees no mercy in me and a seasoned boxer knows when they cannot win.
“And now I’ll take that key.” Riley’s voice is cold as ice.
It may be only favor Anna has ever done for me: she drops the silver key into Riley’s hand and slams the door hard enough to knock a picture off the wall. I should have known Anna wasn’t done with me, that she’d never go quietly. It was just luck she showed up when I wasn’t alone.
“Sorry,” I tell Riley. “You shouldn’t have had to be part of that.”
She presses her lips together in a tight smile. I can still feel them against mine, taste the ice cream we shared. Minutes ago I was kissing her and all she got for it was slandered and shouted at.
Riley looks down at the silver in her hand then turns the key until it’s between her thumb and forefinger. She holds it out to me. I take her wrist and pull her and the key into my lap. With a surprised squeak she lands on me, right where I wanted her to be before Anna barged in. My arms fall around her waist and hold her close.
“I’m sorry,” I repeat softly. “She tries to ruin everything.”
Riley rubs the tip of her nose against mine like we’re Eskimos. “All she ruined was our ice cream.”
“There’s more in the kitchen.” I’d get her a scoopful from the North Pole if she asked, but she just smiles.
“I don’t think we need it.”
Riley slides her hands into my hair and kisses me deeply, the way she was about to before the door opened. Her lips scrub away the angry words I didn’t say to Anna. I didn’t need them; only this can really help.
At some point in the evening I was being gentlemanly but it’s a distant memory as I tip Riley backward onto the couch and she goes down willingly beneath me. Her legs twist in mine, allowing me the deep comfort of full-body contact that has been reserved for our hugs. She fits against me just as perfectly this way. I get my arms under her shoulders so I can squeeze her at the same time.
The reserve Kris has shown is gone. Whatever part was tentative and maybe a little scared has clocked out early and he is kissing me for all he’s worth. He still tastes of ice cream and fudge. The scent of clean, strong boy and the weight of his thick, broad body overwhelm me until I’m melting faster than dessert. There’s no sense of time as we kiss for what seems like a week.
When we finally come up for air, Kris can’t keep the smile off his face. We’re twined together and I couldn’t move if I wanted to. Which I don’t.
“Thank you,” he says.
This isn’t the same gratitude that made me uncomfortable before. I have actually done something this time and feel proud of it. I kiss my answer onto his soft lips and that sets us off again. Within minutes I’m fighting back a whimper. He’s shifting his weight like maybe his lap is getting uncomfortable. We come apart panting.
“We don’t have to rush this,” I say before he can. His gorgeous brown eyes flicker. There’s no mistaking the way my body arches up to meet his, the heat we’re generating or the fact that his knee is firmly planted between my thighs. It’s obvious we want each other but it doesn’t have to be right now. The encounter with Anna and the sudden increase in our speed has probably taken a lot out of him.
He frees one arm to gently brush the hair behind my ear. Then he leans down and whispers something in French – I don’t understand, but it is the single sexiest thing I have ever heard. His breath tickles my skin and he follows it with his lips against my neck.
A swarm of butterflies dive through my stomach. I actually shudder. Kris waits for the moment I quiver and strongly, deliberately rolls his hips firmly down into mine. I gasp at the thrust and an elfin smile crosses his face.
“Do you know what I said?” His lips are inches from mine as I shake my head no. He tips his head down and whispers again. “That last time you left here I made myself a promise: if I got you here again, I’d make you want to stay.”